I Opened My iPhone Notes at 3 AM and All I Found Was a List of Year-Old Harry Potter-Themed Post Ideas Next to an Entry that Just Said “Salami Trucks”

It's 3 AM here. I have many things to do but decided to record a stray thought on my Notes app as though I am someone who does that. The following, lightly edited, potential Niche article titles were the only comprehensible entries I had in my notes: -Niche Quiz: If the different Niche interests were … Continue reading I Opened My iPhone Notes at 3 AM and All I Found Was a List of Year-Old Harry Potter-Themed Post Ideas Next to an Entry that Just Said “Salami Trucks”

Which House MD Characters are Lesbians? Spoiler Alert: Definitely Not Robert Fucking Chase

Are you fucking ready for some lesbians? First Up: Dr. Allison Cameron The only woman who is legally allowed to own a "one vest per episode" number of vests is named Ellen DeGeneres. Cameron is such an archetypal closeted lesbian that it's almost like the House writers traveled forward in time and challenged each other … Continue reading Which House MD Characters are Lesbians? Spoiler Alert: Definitely Not Robert Fucking Chase

Titles for Aaron Sorkin’s To Kill a Mockingbird that Start with “The”

Aaron Sorkin wrote a Broadway version of To Kill a Mockingbird. You may know Aaron for his works that start with "The": The West Wing, The Newsroom, The Social Network. By contrast his works that lacked the "The" haven't taken off as much: Sports Night? Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip? I guess Moneyball was a success … Continue reading Titles for Aaron Sorkin’s To Kill a Mockingbird that Start with “The”

Steady Time-Keepers and Their Tall-ish Pretentious Companions in Pop Culture

You may be surprised but there are NOT as many clock and candlestick representations in pop culture as one would hope.  This is a shame because time-keeping objects are always good symbolism and they are even better when paired with tall showy companions, as I think you will realize in a minute. 1. Cogsworth and … Continue reading Steady Time-Keepers and Their Tall-ish Pretentious Companions in Pop Culture

Tell Us How You Ended Up Marrying Your Way Into A Creepy Mansion That Definitely Has A Haunted Attic And We’ll Guess Which Malevolent Spirit Is Haunting It!

The cold sick dread that wakes you in the middle of the night is not "just in your head." No matter how many times he insists to the contrary you do not bolt upright, drenched in sweat because you "just consumed too much of the 1961 Bordeaux with the duck confit tonight, darling."  The terror-filled howls echoing through … Continue reading Tell Us How You Ended Up Marrying Your Way Into A Creepy Mansion That Definitely Has A Haunted Attic And We’ll Guess Which Malevolent Spirit Is Haunting It!

Five Clickbait Articles I Never Wrote and Their Punchlines Revealed

Every clickbait article I've written and that I haven't written and that anyone has ever written has one conceit that the writer relies on for the entirety of the article. Usually, that punchline can be summed up in a few sentences. This article does exactly that. 1. Every Year the Shamrock Shake Grows Greener and I … Continue reading Five Clickbait Articles I Never Wrote and Their Punchlines Revealed