She asks you if you’d like something to eat. You say you want an olive. She says you two don’t have any olives in the house because she didn’t know you liked them. You pause. You tell her you’ve always liked olives.
Until recently, the free, user-edited online encyclopedia Wikipedia contained a rather glaring error: Namely, it contained separate articles titled Star Wars: Episode IV--A New Hope, and Brideshead Revisited, perpetuating the misconception that rather than just being two names for the same thing, they are two separate works with different characters and different plots. No shame … Continue reading Pending Edits to the Brideshead Revisited Wikipedia Page Where It’s Star Wars Now
From Baz Luhrmann: Interviews, edited by Tom Ryan: “There’s a screenplay for it written by Truman Capote, which I got my hands on. Bob Evans, whom I now know very well and who was running the studio at the time, rejected it. Because, basically, Jordan is gay and Nick is gay and the script is too hardcore.” … Continue reading Excerpts From Truman Capote’s Original Hardcore Gay 1974 Script for ‘The Great Gatsby’ That Baz Luhrmann Has Read But No One Else
From one end of the futch scale to the other. LILY TOMLIN: All lesbians have spent some period of time trying to look like Oscar Wilde. Lily is no exception, and neither am I. TIG NOTARO: This is about the point where the people I love begin to subtly hint that I might need to take … Continue reading Lesbian Comedians Whose Haircuts I Have Shared
She was so beautiful, and so unattainable, and the more unattainable she seemed, the more beautiful she grew. One time you bumped into her outside the biology classroom, and she apologized to you. She called you the wrong name but that was all right. It was better if she didn't know anything about you. For … Continue reading Women in Mary Cassatt Paintings As Straight Girls You’ve Had Crushes On
The Mountain Goats have announced the release of their new album on May 19. It will be called Goths and it will feature songs called ‘Wear Black,’ ‘Abandoned Flesh,’ and ‘Grave Dust.’ Here are some lyrics that I am predicting are on the album, assuming that it consists entirely of quotes from the monster in Mary … Continue reading Things Frankenstein’s Monster Says in Frankenstein That I Believe Will Appear on The Mountain Goats’ Upcoming Album ‘Goths’
1. I began to dream, almost before I ceased to be sensible of my locality. I thought it was morning; and I had set out on my way home, with Hugh Laurie for a guide. The snow lay yards deep in our road; and, as we floundered on, my companion wearied me with constant reproaches … Continue reading Daydreams I Have Had About Punching Hugh Laurie In The Face, If They Were Like The Dreams In ‘Wuthering Heights’
Taub: Taub is not a lesbian, and I hate him. Foreman: Foreman is not a lesbian, but I like him. Masters: Eh…not really. Adams: I don’t know dude, I wasn’t really paying attention to my screen by the time she appeared. I hope she's a lesbian but I’m not, like, invested? Thirteen: Takes her rightful … Continue reading All The Fellows On House Based On How Much They Are Lesbians