If you are a reader of The Niche, a repressed small-town Midwesterner, a gay Christian, the sort of person who collects novelty stamps, or, really, a gay person in any capacity, chances are that you have a sense of Sufjan Stevens’ immense impact on our cultural landscape. But did you know that he’s become enough … Continue reading Every Song That Namedrops Sufjan Stevens Without Actually Being By Sufjan Stevens, Ranked
In the basement of a home in suburban Winnipeg, Bradford How and his high school chums would spend their Friday nights partying while watching Electric Circus, longing to be a part of Toronto’s vibrant nightlife. A television show that aired on MuchMusic and various Chum television networks from 1988 to 2003, Electric Circus offered a … Continue reading An Ode to “Electric Circus,” The Original Tiktok
Let’s cut to the chase: positivity is necessary to survive tough times with grace and sobriety. Little wonder that the phrase #GoodVibesOnly has earned its own hashtag on social media. But now is the time to be realistic instead of blindly optimistic. The coronavirus pandemic isn’t going away anytime soon, and turning a blind eye … Continue reading Six Things You Can Do to Help People Survive the Coronavirus, None of Which Involve Singing “Imagine” From the Comfort of Your Mansion
Due to recent circumstances I’m sure you’re all overly conscious of by this point, every man, woman, and lesbian in America has ended up with an abundance of time on her hands, myself included. When not spending my time staring into the Zoom abyss as my professor attempts to wrangle participation from thirty-five dejected communications … Continue reading Which Baz Luhrmann Lesbian is the Peak Lesbian?
As a long-term sufferer of chronic, incurable Anglophilia, I find myself drawn to content from across the pond with the dyspeptic regularity of an unfortunate intestinal condition. Recently, I’ve begun to compulsively wander into the wilds of “Britcom,” which as you might imagine is short for British comedy. Everyone who’s at least a little bit … Continue reading Thank You Daddy: The Psychosexual Intimacy of Taskmaster
Some days ago, I embarked on this project as a fun way to kill some time while quarantined. It quickly evolved into a harrowing odyssey of grief, regret, and triumph. I have emerged battered, bruised, and bereft of the $119 Canadian dollars I used to impulse-buy the doll who stole my heart during this exercise. … Continue reading All 282 American Girl Doll Outfits, Ranked
A muddy cobblestone path weaves its way through half-dead wildflowers, leading you to the lip of a forest. You take your first steps onto the damp earth, listen to the soft crunch of leaves and twigs beneath your feet. The forest seems to inhale and exhale with every step you take. Robins perched in the … Continue reading What Is It With Lesbians and Hozier?
It gives me no pleasure to report that I have logged 649 hours to date playing The Sims 4. It is, I think, an objectively bad video game, a boring, shallow imitation of my beloved Sims 3, which no longer runs on my computer. (Planned obsolescence; love that!) Nonetheless, nothing relaxes my neurotic prey-animalian brain … Continue reading The Secret History Challenge for The Sims 4
There are two types of gays in this world: Cat Gays, and Dog Gays. Some people believe in a third category, Plant Gays, but those people are wrong and should be shunned. Now, as a bisexual woman, I get to enjoy both cats and dogs. But since I’m actively involved in the rescuing and re-homing … Continue reading Astrology for Cats
Let’s talk about J. C. Leyendecker. One Mr. Joseph Christian Leyendecker. Specifically, how his paintings make me feel a sort of way. If you know J. C. Leyendecker at all, it's probably from his iconic image of the Arrow Collar Man who defined American masculinity for decades. Perhaps you have seen him in a poster … Continue reading Leyendecker Paintings Ranked by How Bad They Make Me Want To Move to a Mansion by the Sea With My Boyfriend And Throw Extravagant Parties