From: Peyton <email@example.com>
To: Funko Pop! Prototype Development <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Subject: Niche Funko Pop Line Suggestions – FINAL
Hope this note finds you well! My apologies for taking so long to get back to you – it’s been a WILD month here at the Niche. We just last week had the chance to sit down with all our staff and hash out our vision for the Niche’s first-ever Funko Pop line. It was a pretty contentious discussion, but I’m happy to say we came out on the other end with a great list of suggestions and only one trip to the ER when Seph and Tom threw down over whether Achilles or Patroclus was the top. What can you do, haha! Lots of passionate minds on our team.
Anyway, without further ado, here’s what we came up with. We sure are looking forward to getting our hands on these babies! I know I can always use one more bobblehead for my desk.
NICHE FUNKO POP LINE PROTOTYPE ORDERS – FINAL
ROBERT POPE LEONARD – COLLECTOR’S SET
We’re going to need prototypes of:
- Robert Pope Leonard – Papal Vestments
- Robert Pope Leonard – Judas in Broadway’s Jesus Christ Superstar
- Lesbian Bernadette
- Bishop Steven
- Swiss Guard Stanley Tucci
Is there any way we could sell a playset along with these? Some kind of Italian azienda agricola cardboard backdrop, with little plastic tomatoes that the characters can eat like apples? I am thinking the backdrop would be reversible, with the set of Jesus Christ Superstar or maybe the Sistine Chapel on the back? I will leave this to your designers. LOL!
NICHE IN REAL LIFE – MINI-COLLECTION
This collection will bring together some of our favourite real-world ‘Niche’ figures, past and present. See below:
- Oscar Wilde & Lord Alfred Douglas (sold together)
- A.E. Housman
- Anne Carson
- Judith Butler
- Anderson Cooper
- Fiona Apple
- Richard “Bobby” Siken
- Alison Bechdel
- Tony Kushner (NOT included with Angels in America playset; Mark Harris sold separately)
- Sufjan Stevens & Drake (sold together)
- Aaron Sorkin
- Patroclus & Achilles (sold together w/ some sort of note explaining historical ambiguity re: who topped)
- Joanna Newsom
- Hanya Yanagihara
- John Darnielle
- Jane Fonda & Lily Tomlin (sold together, with Jane Fonda’s Vagina Lobby cardboard backdrop included)
OLD HOUSE MEMES – MINI-COLLECTION
We’re going to need House and Wilson but we’re also going to need to sell to-scale plastic replicas of 1892QAFRNJ. I realize this may present manufacturing difficulties but I don’t give a shit. If you can’t produce a convincing plastic 1892QAFRNJ complete with LGR, attic room, and miniature “rescute” dog, we will press charges and we WILL win. Our attorney is the best.
JESSE AND ANDREW DREAMZ – MINI-COLLECTION
This collection imagines, “What if Jesse Eisenberg and Andrew Garfield had worked together more than once?” It will include bobbleheads of their well-known characters from 2010’s “The Social Network,” as well as a number of “imagined” projects. See below:
- Jesse Eisenberg as Mark Zuckerberg
- Andrew Garfield as Eduardo Saverin; three variants, note:
- Caribbean Night at the Jewish Frat Costume (straw hat a MUST)
- Taking a Taxi Over from SFO in the Rain
- “Sorry My Prada’s At the Cleaners Along With My Hoodie and My Fuck You Flip Flops You Pretentious Douchebag” – can we prototype one w/ him holding a smashed Macbook? pls advise
- Jesse Eisenberg as Yentl
- Andrew Garfield as Avigdor
- Jesse Eisenberg as Joe Kavalier
- Andrew Garfield as Sam Clay
- Jesse Eisenberg as Andy Sachs in The Devil Wears Prada
- Andrew Garfield as Emily Blunt’s Character in The Devil Wears Prada
- Andrew Pope Garfield
- Bishop Jesse
- Nun Emma Stone
- Taylor “Johanna” Swift
- Swiss Guard Stanley Tucci – can double for both RPL & APG collections
- Jesse & Andrew Regency AU Playset
- NOTE: Sensitive and classified. Send me your SecureDrop PGP Key and I will forward sketches.
ANGELS IN AMERICA PLAYSET
We’re going to need prototypes of all the principals (Louis, Harper, Joe, Roy Cohn, Hannah, Belize, The Angel, Ethel Rosenberg), likely some cardboard backdrops of notable locations (e.g., heaven, Bethesda Fountain, Joe’s courthouse office, Antarctica, park bench, hospital room, Mormon puppet theatre), and at LEAST nine separate Prior Walters, one for each iconic style moment from the 2017 National Theatre production. Again, Tony Kushner sold separately.
Okay, I think that should about do it! LMK if you have questions and I’ll try to go into more detail.
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2 thoughts on “Some Suggestions for the First-Ever Niche Funko Pop Line”
Listen I despise those tiny little things. I have three and people keep offering them to me but I don’t like them and I don’t know how to make them stop without offending them. However, if I had a Prior/Andrew Garfield one, with the iconic scarf look he has at the beginning of part 2, I wouldn’t complain.
Im currently rereading all the old posts on this site and this is tremendously powerful