@Aeneas - 3:11 PM Some personal news: I'll be heading off to Italy next week at the behest of Apollo! Super nervous, and totally gonna miss everyone here in Carthage, but so excited about this next chapter. Shoot me a text & let's grab brunch before I go. @QueenDido - 3:16 PM lmao @Aeneas - … Continue reading The Aeneid, As Told in Subtweets
The first red flag was printed on the label, three words, tucked small in the bottom right: frozen dairy dessert. I was standing in the ice cream aisle at Loblaw's, and I saw those three words, and I thought, "Huh, that must mean Halo Top doesn't meet the Canadian Food Inspection Agency's legal definition of 'ice … Continue reading Halo Top is a Scam
Dear readers, I have recently become enamored of the works of Susan Sontag, best known for her illuminating essays, such as Against Interpretation, On Photography, and Notes on ‘Camp’ -- which is, delightfully, being turned into the theme for next year’s Met Gala. I have been making my way through the first volume of her journals, Reborn: … Continue reading Ten Susan Sontag Quotes Ranked By How Badly They Make Me Feel Like I Need to Lie Down
Niche readers know that when it comes to boys, we've got aaaaall the prime cuts of beef. Are they ugly? Yeah baby. Are they hot? Indubitably. Do they have what my dad calls "a lot of face"? Face abounds. So when Niche editor Seph came to me with the idea to pilfer Karen Han (@karenyhan … Continue reading Niche Boys (after Karen’s Boys)
About eighteen months ago, my dear friend and collaborator Olive mentioned a want of soup in the middle of the night. We then had a riveting conversation about the virtues of the world's soups and decided: Hey! Why not rank them all for The Niche, where we can make our voices heard re:soup? But the … Continue reading The Olives Rank Soup: Abridged Edition
Chapter 1 It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. However little known the feelings or views of such a man may be on his first entering a neighbourhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the … Continue reading The Full Text of Pride & Prejudice But I Replaced Every Instance of “Darcy” With “Gritty”
Rainn Wilson was born to play Prior Walter.
Friends, homos, countrymen, it is my pleasure to announce that, as of 5:41 PM Eastern Standard Time, The Niche has garnered one million hits. What began as a website for five people has blossomed into something much grander. Friendships have been forged. Graduate degrees have been completed. Romances have bloomed. Hearts have been broken. Pants … Continue reading The Niche: A Website for A Million People
In 1988 after spending two years at El Paso High School, he enrolled in Woodberry Forest School, an all-male boarding school in Madison County, Virginia. When sixteen-year-old Beto O'Rourke arrives at the elite Woodberry Forest School for Boys, he's a complete outsider. Transplanted from El Paso, the social and academic pressure of New England is alien to him. … Continue reading Some Suggestions for Beto O’Rourke Fanfiction, Based on His Truly Ridiculous Wikipedia Page
Sufjan Stevens is so many people. Compiling this list, and hopping from holiday jams to S&M-club electronica to acoustic musings on death, was a complete and utter joy. Let's get into it! Pace yourself! Please note: This list includes every officially released song which credits Sufjan Stevens as a primary artist. It excludes live recordings, remixes, … Continue reading All 293 Sufjan Stevens Songs, Ranked
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